Top Ten Best (Actual) Excuses for Missing My Class:
#10- We had to move to a new shelter.
#9- I was having my baby.
#8- I was getting an abortion.
#7- I got locked up.
#6- My moms got locked up.
#5- My friend was really worried about our other friend so we went to look for him, and he had hung himself in his bedroom.
#4- I was having facial reconstruction surgery. Mister, why was I born like this? Is it a mutation? Are we gonna study that in this class?
#3- My brother got shot. Mistah, what it mean when they say he “stable”?
#2- My dad was murdered on Friday. It’s in the paper.
#1- My uncle cut my auntie into little tiny pieces. Mistah, he crazy.